Chapter 2~Homeschooling: Hindering the Maturation Process

Matthew 19:5"...For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh." the day will come when your child will "leave" your home. This is a painful experience for moms and dads, but it is the will of God.

I have no problem with this at all


God has a purpose for that child you are rearing. Children belong to God, lent to us for a little while to love and train to glorify God with their lives. If they fail to do the will of God, we, to a degree, have failed to do the will of God.

Also agree with this.


God said for this "cause" shall a man leave his father and mother. God has a "cause " and "pupose" for our children. For most young people marriage, child rearing and building a godly heritage for their children is one of God’s purposes for them leaving home. God also desires to use your child as a soulwinner to win lost souls to Christ. They must "leave" home to accomplisth these purposes fully.

Once again he is only use half of a verse. Here is the entire verse. Mat 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? The only reason for a young person to leave home is marriage. There is no way around this. This is what is taught in the verse.


It is our job as parents to rear children who are equipped to do God’s purposes. Your home is to be a launching pad, not a final destination. Our task is to give our children their cargo (knowledge etc...) and send them off on their mission. We must teach our children to be independent. They begin their lives dependent upon mom and dad. we are their protector, comforter, need supplier, everything! But they must be trained to make it without us. They must be taught about Jesus and salvation; dependence they once placed upon us must be transferred to Jesus Christ. There are also some things they must learn to do themselves; they must be taught responsibility --from putting toys away, to dressing themselves. It all prepares them to leave an cleave. What preparations are you making to help your child become independent from you and dependent upon God? The training must begin early. Let them go to camp for a week. In high school they will play sports and have friends (make sure they are good ones). These activities outside the home are healthy and help develop your child’s independence.

We must train them to be DEPENDANT on God, not Independant. My child’s peer group is his siblings, all of whom are being trained for the same purpose, the same goal in mind. A goal that I as a parent have set for them, not some camp, sports coach, or teacher. As a parent I have the responsibility to make sure that my child’s "Good friends" are Godly, the only way I can do this is to train them myself. Children at school become dependant on their peer group not on God. 


The problem with homeschooling is that it retards this process. Homeschooling parents are very slow to allow their children to go to camps etc., anything outside the home is looked at as competition for time or love. Parents become overanxious about kids going anywhere over ten minutes from home. The problem came when the parent should have kissed their child good-bye and sent them off to school, they kept them at home. When the child should have begun the first step in "leaving" or cutting mamma’s apron strings, mommy kept them at home and tied the strings even tighter by investing every hour, every day together over endearing mamma’s heart to the kids, making it nearly impossible to "let go." This process only gets worse with age, and soon the children catch on, and the best Christian kids find themselves torn between serving God and staying at home, a battle their parents created. "Leave" and "cleave" are God’s words. They are in the best interest of your children. Your children must be allowed to leave home, do God’s will, marry, have a family and win others to Christ, Whether near home or on the other side of the world if God desires. You must prepare them to leave and cleave It is a part of their spiritual and physical survival and success. A good Christian school will help you and your children in the process.

Homeschooling parents can be slow to send their children out to camps etc. because of the lack of good Godly places to send the kids.  It is not that it is competition of time or love but a lack of the same standards and the same desires for the children.  

Cutting the apron strings can be done and should be done even if you are homeschooling.  There are so many ways to help your child learn to be independent. 

The words leave and cleave had to do with a young man leaving his family and cleaving to his wife to create his own family.  Nothing more.  

Also the Bible tells us in Malachi that the fathers are the ones whose hearts are to be bound to their children.  As a mother I am to help turn my children's hearts to their fathers.

And a Christian school just teaches children to be dependent upon a different peer group.  I would much rather have my children look upon the family as their peer group rather than other children,  christian school, or public school.