Thursday, October 23, 2008

The case of the Missing Blogger

Do you ever come to a point in your life where things seem to be changing faster than you can keep up? You struggle so much for footing and everything seems to be shifting. I am so glad that I am a daughter of the King of Kings and when all else is in flux, the Solid Rock stands firm under me. Thank you Father for the promise that under us who are yours are the "everlasting arms"

Things have changed for us in major ways. First off we have 4 children in Christian school, I am a mama with a homeschooling heart and yet I have followed my husband in this and trusted his wisdom and leadership and submitted and bit my tongue and put the children in school. We had many reasons for doing this, some very personal and some not. But needless to say my "head" has decided that I needed this time to get some sure footing under me and so off to school the children went.

It is not any christian school that they are going to. It is a first year school and the pastor wanted our children in to help set the tone for the school. What an awesome compliment to the children. Also it is a church members school only, meaning they are not going to be taking children who have no where else to go. It is very strict and that is what we want. So they are in school for now and we will reevaluate how everything has gone at the end of this year.

Also this is the longest I have gone without getting pregnant since we decided to leave things in the Lords hands. It is different but at the same time because of some health problems we have been advised to stop having children. This came from 3 different OB's and one awesome Christian midwife. So God is taking care of this in his way. Just very different for me not to be nursing a baby or carrying a precious life in me (can you tell I MISS being pregnant).

The next big change is just in the ages of the children. We are hitting a time when it is more refining what they have become than molding them. It is a scary thought when you think that you have had them for over half the time they most likely will be with you. You see what all you would do different and I tend to panic and think we are failing. Then you see your oldest in tears because a person visiting the church says they are not saved and does not want to get saved. (how many times have you wept for a soul)

The last really BIG thing is I am finally taking all of my own very good advise and getting my house in order. But you say, your website is on homemaking, and you have a homekeeping journal, and numerous print outs on homemaking and housekeeping. Yes, you would be correct to say that but it has just recently come to my attention that for all of the head knowledge I have on this, and it is alot as my Hubby says, I have never taken it to heart. I came to the conclusion, (actually a good friend looked me in the eye and said "For all the time you have stayed home you have hated being a housewife") Thanks for being honest Ann. She was so right. She and I talked and when the dirt settled I was able to admit I hid from my duties of being what I knew my family needed by "helping" others in the area that I was failing in. I hid from my family on the net. Oh, it was all for noble purposes. I was setting those white washed feminest straight on the forums, I was making list but not doing them, I was getting our schedule tweaked in microsoft word, I was running a website, I was blogging and reading numerous blogs, but all the while the children where only seeing my backside. What really hurt was when Ann asked if I ever jumped up from the computer and hurridly turned it off when I heard Mr. Visionary's car come in the drive. I blush to say that happened more times than I care to admit.

So why am I back on. Well I really do miss alot of you who are here in blog land. I have made some great friends. I have learned alot. And I am finally getting a handle on things. I really want to stay here and blog and learn from you all and hopefully I can help some others also.

I have my fall cleaning done, and am getting into a routine in the home. I can finally say I have come to ENJOY and thrive on being a homemaker. Such peace comes from knowing who you are and who God made you to be, and then just going ~ahhhhh~ Lord, Father I am resting in you.

Romans 9:20 says "Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it. Why hast thou made me thus?" God made me to be a keeper at home, a wife, a mother. That is what I was designed for. True peace only comes when I am willing to work the work that I was made for.

~Father, thank you so much for your patience with me. Help me to keep my focus on you and remember what I am made to do.~

Bless all of you who read this
In HIS Keeping
Mrs. B


Lisa said...

You have been tagged! Check my blog out!

Jamie Stroupe said...

WOW..... Mrs.B that was a very good post.

It is hard to admit our faults and very hard to admit them to everyone else.

I think that it is great on being submissive to your husband, by sending your children to a Christian School. It is amazing how they can tell what is best for you and the children. I know that it must be very hard being a home school mom myself, I couldn't imagine Andrew telling me to send them to school. The Lord makes them the head of the house hold for a reason.

I will be praying for you and your new journey to a whole new life style of being a keeper at home.

I am also so very sorry for being so far behind on your post, I really don't know how I skipped this very important post.


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